


Is that a challenge, cowboy?

by deli_cious



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: and I definitely spent all night writing this lol, its basically 2000 of lance being a petty size queen, they dont actually do the do - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-29
Updated: 2019-08-29
Packaged: 2020-09-28 21:51:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20433014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deli_cious/pseuds/deli_cious
Summary: Keefers: Lance, what the actual fuck?Keefers: Isnt that a little over-ambitious? Your like the size of a twig.LanceyLance: Is that a challenge, cowboy?Pigeon: Blocked. both of you





	Is that a challenge, cowboy?

**Author's Note:**

> So this was inspired off of a tweet by @BttmLance Here: https://twitter.com/BttmLance/status/1166829154446249984 so, yeah this is what you get lol

Opened Mom Said It Was My Turn On The College Debt 

LanceyLance: HOLY SHIT LOOK AT THIS FUCKI G THING ITS HUGEE

A blurry image was sent in chat, like the photographer could not stop moving as he took it, and to be fair, Lance couldn't. He had been giggling non stop since he found the thing. 

That thing being a massive piece of silicone called the ‘Goliath’. It was a modest 15” long and with a nice 15” circumference as the middle, and Lance could not stop fucking giggling. 

HunkyPoo: Lance

HunkyPoo: Did you finish your part yet?

LanceyLance: yes, dear already sent it to pidgey

Pigeon: i will taze u

Pigeon: also wtf lance i dont want to see ur fetishes 

LanceyLance: not a fetish!!!! 

LanceyLance: i thought it was funny

LanceyLance: and im getting it

HunkyPoo: Dude why?

Pigeon: again, i dont want to know 

LanceyLance: as a joke you guys come on!!!

HunkyPoo: a $300 joke?

LanceyLance: Yes!! Imagine busting that out as a prop!! Hilarious!!

Keefers: Lance, what the actual fuck?

Keefers: Isnt that a little over-ambitious? Your like the size of a twig.

LanceyLance: Is that a challenge, cowboy?

Pigeon: Blocked. both of you 

HunkyPoo: This is SUPPOSED to be a group project chat

Pigeon: not a chat for keith to break lance’s asshole 

LanceyLance: he his NOT breaking my asshole!!!

Keefer: I am NOT breaking his asshole!

Lance set down his phone and turned back to the computer screen. He was half kidding at first, he did think it would be funny, and a conversation starter, but he didn’t know about spending three hundred buckaroos on the thing. 

But then Keith challenged him. That was a challenge wasn't it? A dare to try, and Lance never backed down from a dare. So, ten minutes and a weeping credit card later, Lance had a confirmation receipt in his inbox. 

_________________________________________

Lance received the tracking number two days later, reminding him that oh, yeah, he was doing that. But was it even going to fit? Sure, he had some experience in anal, but it never went past two fingers on himself.

Nothing even remotely that size. 

He licked his lips, turning over onto his back. Maybe he should practice a little, so he couldn feel more confident. He reached into his bedside table and brought out the bottle of lube he kept there. He switched off the dorms wifi and went into incognito mode on his browser, holding his phone up as he started googling the best ways to stretch his ass out. Finding some really informative forums and some really not informative videos. But they were still nice to have playing in the background so he let them go. 

He stroked himself through his briefs, long slow movements. Every single thread he saw said that he needed to be relaxed, it would make it easier so he was going to do that. Take his time and get himself in the mood. 

When he started to feel a wet spot in his underwear is when he decided to venture under the fabric. He pushed the briefs down, letting his cock lay flatley against his stomach, staring at it for a moment. 

Some forms suggested cumming first, to relax the body, if the person was super inexperienced, but Lance was a little experienced, so he ignored his member for now. Saying sorry to his little buddy as he pushed his fingers past his balls, wanting to focus on the task. He set the phone down, the noise still low in his ear as he coated his hole and fingers Liberally. Shivering with a little regret for not warming it up first. 

Deep breath in, deep breath out, in, out. On his third out he pushed on finger in and instantly felt himself tense back up. Okay, thank god he was taking this as slow as he was. He didn't think it’d been that long since he fingers himself, but apparently his body already forgot the sensation, so he really was starting from square one. 

He closed his eyes, trying to get himself back into that relaxed state. His free hand gently stroking himself as he just listened to the man on screen moan obscenely. They weren't bad or obnoxiously fake at least, so it did help set the mood.

Finally he wiggled his fingers in more, past the first knuckle. He had to take a little break once he reached the second, but it was going smoothly so far. Giving his dick encouraging little tugs in between. When he was relaxed, this did feel good. His finger was all the way to the base and Lance let out a satisfied little moan. He shifted further up his headboard, licking his lips before curling his fingers like the forums had suggested and oh god. He was seeing white.

“Keith!” He moaned as he came, his release splattering on his stomach. 

Never mind that that was barely two minutes and ine finger, never mind how humiliating it was to know his ass was that sensitive. What he refused to admit was that he had just cum calling Keith's name. 

“Nope, didn't happen, don't remember it.” The cuban pulled his covers over his body and went to sleep just like that.

————————————————————————

A week later he was managing to get four fingers in. (Never mind the fact the second day he had to keep going after he already had an orgasm just so he could actually get the second finger in this time. Why are you trying to embarrass him like this?)

The package sat at the back of his building, clearly written was his name and he scrambled to pick it up as soon as he remembered what it was he had ordered recently. Thank god for discrete brown packaging.

He ran upstairs and slammed the door behind him. Throwing the box down in the middle of the living room and staring at it. 

It was for a joke, Lance, and to prove that mullet rocking emo wrong, stop blushing you little bitch. After his unnecessary pep talk he ripped into the box and sure enough, the Goliath laid beneath. He picked it up, admiring it for a moment because damn, you didn't realize how big 15” was until you were holding it. 

He gulped, before a wide grin spread across his face. Oh this was too fucking funny.” Pulling out his phone, he immediately snapped a selfie with it, winking at the camera.

My Said Its My Turn On the College Debt

LanceyLance: Ladies and Gentlemen, we got him.

Pigeon: holy shit the fucking mad man 

HunkyPoo: Lance, dude literally look at the chat name.

Lance ignored Hunks practical advice in favor of switching over to Keiths and his text string. He took another selfie with the thing, this time licking the Goliath through its hard plastic packaging. 

LanceyLance: You’re on, Kogane.

And when he tells you that is the fastest Keith had ever texted him back, it is the fastest Keith had ever text him back. He didn't even get a chance to close the chat before Keith was sending him a simple message of three lone question marks. 

Lance did not dignify him with an answer because he finally had the thing he had been practicing all week for right in his hands and he was not going to wait any longer. 

He cut into the plastic, sure to recycle it, then gave his new toy a good cleaning before heading to his bed. 

Now that he was actually preparing to use it, it was a lot more daunting than he'd like to admit. He stared, like the thing was going to make the first move before groaning and getting on with it. Striping of his shirt, reached for the bottle of lube again, setting it out. 

This was hotter than it should have been. He should be terrified this thing was going to rip him in half but instead he was looking forward to it. Already twitching in his pants. He wriggled out of them, along with his boxers, and tossed them into a pile. 

As excited as he was, he needed to stretch first. The site said 8” curcumfrience at the tip so he needed to stretch and stretch well. 

So thats what he did. Two lubed fingers slide in easily, scissoring himself open, taking his time to stretch his rim nice and wide, then adding a third. And a fourth. 

He rotated his hips on his hand, shuddering. No. No, Lance, focus. You have a job to do. He shook his head, trying to keep his pleasure to a minimum. He could cum later, he was on a mission.

8” wasnt easy though and that was just the tip. If he wanted to take the whole thing today he needs to be through. So, shifting his body, he got comfortable, and went to town on himself. 

A half hour later and Lance’s fingers were throbbing but it was worth it because he felt loose and plient. His legs smeared with a weird mixture of pre and lube. 

He did fantastic at holding himself back. Stopping every time he felt himself get too close to the release and reeling himself back in. He wanted to savour the moment and he knew that when he came he was going to be too exhausted to continue. 

He needed to prove Keith wrong. He had too.

Speaking of, how was he going to show Keith his accomplishment? Inviting him over would just take too much time. He looked back at his phone. Aha! He pulled both hands out from between his legs, wiping him on his blanket (that was seriously going to have to be washed today) and opening his phone, flicking to the camera app. 

A few attempts as a pillow and textbook tower later, he finally got the perfect angle. The screen showing from his nipples down so Keith could enjoy the full view- Not enjoy! See! To prove him wrong! That's what he was doing this for. 

Lance stood on his knees, sinking into the mattress only slightly. His hips rocking a little as he started to position the Goliath right in the perfect spot. He leaned back on his hands, giving Keith a perfect view of his stretched hole, and the way the massive toy caught on the rim of it. 

And slowly, carefully, he started his descent, and oh, God. It was better than anything he could imagine. “Nnnh!” He bit his lip, a full body shudder taking over him as he made it past the tip. He had to pause, because that was nearly enough to make him blow and he wasn't done proving himself yet. 

He lifted his hips slightly before starting to let himself drop again. His toes curling as he got closer to the middle of the shaft. Panting heavier. He couldn't hold back his moans and mewls now, showing the camera he was just as vocal in the bedroom as he was out of it. 

“Fuck!” He whined, feeling a slight burn and having to pause, taking deep shaky breaths. Slowly it subsided and he pushed down further, feeling himself get over the widest point because from then on it was easier. 

“Fuck...Keith…” He whimpered, needy and low, as finally (Finally!) He reached the bottom. Feeling the smooth balls touching his. He grinned, euphoria filling him. 

“Yes!” He cheered, pumping his fists in the air, sudden in the stillness that had filled his room. 

He was regretting it now though, because the sudden movement caused his wobbly legs to finally give. He fell back on his ass, and if he felt the thing couldn’t get any deeper, it definitely did. “Ah!” He nearly screamed, his body trembling as he let go after all this time. His cum shooting out all over his bed. (He might just have to burn the sheets at this point.)

Lance gripped his bedding, eyes squeezed shut. Did he die and go to heaven? Because that's what it felt like. 

Once he stopped seeing white, he slowly opened his eyes. Blinking as he looked at the camera still rolling before throwing up and goofy peace sign and ending the recording just like that.

He sent it before he could second guess himself. 

LanceyLance: Challenge completed, cowboy.

**Author's Note:**

> btw if you want, you can check out my twitter @deli_rot sometimes i post things


End file.
